aN ode to a happy thoughT..

it's been 7 months since my grampa died.. it's the first time i experienced death from the closest kin since i was 4years old. i must say, handling grief is never easy.
My grandfather was the closest resemblance i had of a father. he was a retired army soldier of WW1.
we had been together since i was 9 when my parents got separated and i had been living with my mom in my grandfather's house. i must say i still cry whenever i remember him. he was like a bestfriend to me. like a happy thought. he did promise to hold on to his life until he sees me graduate. unfortunately, he died on november 13, 2009 (friday the 13th).. my graduation was MARCH2010..
i wanted to give him my diploma when i got to that stage.. to see him smile at me and hear him say he's proud of me..
but, death is inevitable and unpredictable. When i got home from that field trip with my college classmates, i took a peep and saw him sleep like a baby. i then slept inside my room that was beside my granpa's room. i was awakened with my tito's screaming that my lolo stopped breathing.. at that moment, i couldn't move. i was sleeping in the room next to my dead grandfather's room and that wasn't the horrific part. the part where i saw him motionless in his bed was when i froze. everyone else was busy reviving him but i just stood there...

but now, i have in my room my diploma...
somehow, it's a bitter-sweet victory for me...